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Macanudo Ascot Maduro.

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A quest to fuel the desire to smoke various smoldering objects yielded me a box of these Macanudo Ascot Maduros. And they made me sad. 

Problem is, Macanudo in general makes really good cigars. They are cheap, and for the price asked truly awesome. Or maybe they are not, but I will hold to this misconception of mine. 

This, however, fails in case of Maduro Ascots. They look like a darker version of normal ascots, they are made by Macanudo, yet sympathetic magic fails here: they do not taste like I would expect them to. In fact, at some stages through the cigar they actually taste like something that a dog has made, and dogs in general are not known for producing anything but crap. 

Funnily enough, they (cigars, not dogs and their byproducts) do have an absolutely epic, coffee aftertaste. They also taste best (or just taste) in their last third, which is not too common with cigars, as far as I can tell. 

Another problem, apart from funny taste, is the fact that people who make them have truly ascended to the top of cockhandness. Or maybe, if they are made by machines, robots have already turned on us and those small cigars are the first shells fired on the human race from the heartless metal beasts who will reasonably soon rule the earth. Or maybe I am right and it really were dogs who made them. Bottom line is, they are not really well made. And this is a shame, as if they didn't unravel, I'd probably think of them as very well made. 

All of that leads me to a interesting conclusion: me (and probably someone else) are much better off buying things like fake beards, pottery or even an axe murder, than spending money on these. Which are, here in Australia, not that cheap anyway. 

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